A NEW HEART

“And I will give you a new heart with new and right desires, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony heart of sin and give you a new, obedient heart.” (Ezekiel 36:26 NLT)

I gave my husband a kiss and jogged off into the darkness, leaving him and Teddy, our golden retriever, at the dog park with all their dog park friends. Normally by 5:15 I would be done with my morning run and be happily sipping coffee while having my quiet time with the Lord. But my daughter Elizabeth is off having a grand adventure in Costa Rica and my husband and I decided it probably wasn’t wise to go running at four o’clock in the morning by myself. So I switched up my schedule. I still get up at the same time but I have my quiet time first and then go running while Marc and Teddy hang out at the dog park with a group of men who take their dogs to the park at that same time each morning.
I actually find I enjoy this new schedule. Sitting with the Lord first allows me the opportunity to ponder His Word while I run. I like to ponder, don’t you? I turned eastward just as a barn owl flew through the palm trees that lined the street; their graceful fronds gently swaying as the powerful wings of the owl carried him off into the pre-dawn darkness. “How I love the morning,” I thought to myself. There is something about this time of morning when the world is still that nourishes my spirit.
I know many people who prefer to sleep in but not me. I want to get up and wrap my arms around the stillness of the morning; to rejoice in the color of night as it wakes up to the dawn and the stars begin to turn out their lights and the moon begins her descent until she hides behind the mountain peaks. I like to bask in the glorious stillness before the world wakes up and stirs everything into a frenzied pace – as the world likes to do.
I headed south towards the lake and my thoughts turned to the New Year we were beginning. “A new day in a new year,” I thought to myself. “A new woman, with a new heart in a new day in a new year,” He said. I hadn’t heard Him arrive and my heart looked at Him who loves me and smiled. We were running passed the lake and I slowed my pace as I took in the reflection of the mountains on the water. My friend, Mr. Swan floated gracefully across the water trumpeting a hearty good morning to us, and He who gave the swan its voice laughed and it seemed to me that the trees clapped their hands and all the ducks joined in the celebration of the new day He had given.
“What are you thinking about?” He asked as we headed into mile number four. I knew He already knew my thoughts, but He loves it when I tell Him everything, even the smallest details. “Well,” I said, “I was just thinking about the verses we read together in Ezekiel 36 this morning. You know the ones about the heavenly heart surgery where you take out the stony heart of sin and replace it with a new heart with new and right desires – a heart that obeys you.” I fell silent as I listened to my shoes make a clop, clop, clop sort of sound on the concrete as we ran. I looked down at His feet, you know the ones with the scars on them, and I wondered that His feet didn’t make all the noise my earth feet made, and why was it He could run four miles and never be out of breath. He laughed then, and I knew He had heard my thoughts – even my unspoken deep ones. I laughed too.
“Why is it,” I continued, “that new hearts sometimes do old things? It doesn’t seem like it should be that way. It’s so, so hurtful.” I finished, my eyes looking at the ground as we ran. A verse from His book came to mind then from James 3:11: “Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring?” I knew those words were about what came off the tongue, but His book also tells us that what comes out of a person either in word or deed begins in the heart. I knew that old things came out of my heart too – it was an ongoing battle. “Why is it that way?” I whispered. “You must choose it,” His voice came softly through my soul. “Choose what?” I asked. “Newness,” He replied. We approached the dog park just then. We laughed as we saw Teddy standing at the fence with his head peeking through the fence. I lightly touched his velvety nose as we ran by, calling out a greeting to Marc as we continued our run. I couldn’t help but take a moment to thank Him whom my soul loves for the man He had given me as my husband and friend. “You are welcome,” He replied.
We returned to our conversation as I asked, “To choose newness sounds easy, so why don’t we always choose it?” I asked. “Weak walls,” He replied. My heart looked at Him questioningly. The scars on His brow – you know the deep ones where the soldiers so cruelly pushed a crown of thorns, grew more pronounced and I knew we were having a most serious talk indeed. So my heart leaned in closer as my feet continued running – I love that even when I am running my heart can be still at the Well of His presence – and He told me a story. It’s a story of new hearts and choosing the new over the old. I hope you like it as much as I did.
Cora sat very still in the chair that sat before the window that overlooked the lake. Her eyes appeared tired, her frame too thin and her bent posture made her look much older than her thirty years. “Good morning beautiful,” Peter said as he entered the room. Cora looked up at her husband as he knelt by the chair and kissed the end of her nose as he gently picked up her hands in his. “So what are your plans for today?” he asked. “Same as yesterday and the day before that and the day before that and…” Cora’s voice trailed off and disappeared in a cloud of defeat.
“Cora, it’s such a pretty morning. There are daffodils blooming down by the lake. You always loved daffodils. I could wheel you down there and then very gently and slowly we can walk by the water.” Peter stood and headed to the corner of the room where the wheelchair sat. But Cora would have nothing to do with it. “No, Peter. I won’t do it. I won’t go.” She said in a voice almost too soft to hear.” “But Cora,” Peter began. But before he could say more, Cora held up a hand indicating she would not listen to his plea. Her mind was made up.
Peter returned the still unused wheelchair to the corner just as Nurse Thompson entered the room. The nurse nodded toward Cora with a questioning look in her eyes and Peter silently shook his head in response to her wordless question, letting her know that nothing in Cora had changed. Peter motioned Nurse Thompson out into the hallway and she followed him out, closing the door quietly behind them.
Peter’s voice was desperate as he said in hushed tones, “I don’t know how to reach Cora. I have done everything I know to do but she refuses to leave the room; refuses to do any of the exercises. She can’t stay in the rehab center forever. I, I don’t know what to do,” he finished. “May I pray with you?” Nurse Thompson asked. Peter’s head shot up as he looked at her and said, “I didn’t know you were a Christian. Yes, please do pray.” So standing in the hallway a kind, gentle Jesus lover prayed for a man who had run out of ideas and for a woman who was trapped by fear of the new and so was clinging to the old.
“Thank you,” Peter said as Nurse Thompson finished talking to Jesus about this couple of whom she had grown very fond indeed. “Don’t give up,” she said as Peter opened the door of Cora’s room. Peter walked over and in the most cheerful voice he could muster said, “Cora, I am heading to work. I will be back around noon. What sounds good to you for lunch?” He waited but no reply came so he kissed his wife’s forehead, picked up his briefcase and headed off into the world; a world oblivious to the pain he and Cora were in.
Peter stepped off the elevator, walked through the lobby and as he walked through the double glass doors into the glorious sunshine, he made a decision. He pulled his cell phone from the clip on his belt and dialed a familiar number. “Good morning,” a cheerful voice greeted. “Hey Bob,” Peter said, forcing himself to sound normal in the midst of the abnormal. “How are you doing Pete?” Bob asked with genuine concern for his friend in his voice. Peter began to say he was fine, but suddenly felt a nudge by an unseen hand to come clean with his friend so he said, “Truthfully, Bob, I am having a hard time of it. I wonder if, if…” “Where are you Pete?” Bob asked. Peter quickly told Bob he was at the rehab center and Bob said he would meet him down at the lake. Peter placed his cell phone back in its clip and headed to the lake.
Peter sat staring out at the water, uncertain how much time had passed when he felt a hand on his shoulder as Bob took a seat on the bench. “I come bearing gifts,” Bob said as he handed Peter a cup of his favorite coffee and a pastry from their favorite coffee shop. “Thanks Bob,” Peter said, grateful for the food and coffee, but mostly for the presence of his friend. “Tell me,” Bob said simply giving Peter his full attention.
“Peter was unaccustomed to sharing the intimate details of his life with anyone other than Cora and the Lord, but felt God impressing on him the need to rely on Christian brothers to walk this road with him. His thoughts went back to Nurse Thompson’s prayer and how he felt strangely helped – that seemed to affirm in his mind what he needed to do. He needed to reach out. So clearing his throat he explained the situation to his friend.
Bob listened intently, asking questions here and there to gain understanding; all the while praying in his heart for wisdom from the One who promises to give wisdom to those who ask. As Peter finished Bob reached into the pocket of his briefcase and pulled out a Bible. As he read Psalms the words seemed to rise up off the page and walk right into Peter’s heart – strengthening him. He had been so absorbed in the situation that he had neglected being in the Word for himself, and this thought made him wonder about Cora. In her state she most assuredly had not been in the Word.
Bob noticed the cloud pass over Peter’s face so he asked what he was thinking about. Peter’s voice was raw with emotion as he spoke, “I felt strengthened as you read God’s Word and I realized how long it had been since I had been in the Word with all that has been going on. And then I thought about Cora and how I have failed as a husband to nurture my wife through reading God’s Word to her when she has so obviously been unable to read it for herself,” “Pete,” Bob said, “don’t go down the path of ‘should’ve, could’ve’ – that’s a sure road to despair and exactly where the enemy wants you, so do what God says instead.
Bob opened his Bible to Philippians 4:6-7 and read the words out loud to his friend, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” “So Pete, what do you say we put those words into practice right here and now,” Bob said. Peter nodded in agreement and there on a lakeside bench two men bowed their heads and poured out their requests to the Lord. As they prayed they were unaware of events taking place in a small office tucked into a back corner of the rehab facility just up the hill from where they sat.
Kate handed the form to the woman sitting behind the desk and smiled at her. Kate couldn’t help but smile. The smile on her lips began in her heart – a new heart and just sort of burst out all over. She couldn’t contain it. “You are very young,” the woman behind the desk observed as she peered at Kate over her reading glasses before returning her attention to the paperwork. But then something on the paper caught her eye and she looked up at Kate and then back at the paper and then back at Kate as though unsure what she read was true. “Excuse me a moment,” the woman said as she picked up the paper and disappeared through a door marked: Private. Kate heard whispering from behind the door and then it opened slightly and she saw another woman peering out and then the door closed followed by more whispering. Kate giggled, uncertain of what was going on. All she really knew was that she was sitting in this chair, in this rehab center because the Lord had sent her there. She knew she was young but she also knew with every fiber of her being that God had a call on her life; He was going to use her new heart for His glory – she knew it and the thought caused her to smile all over again. A few floors above where Kate sat a battle was being waged – a battle between the old and the new.
Cora lay in bed staring at the ceiling. She knew her fear was irrational but knowing it didn’t loosen fear’s grip on her. She closed her eyes in an effort to shut out the onslaught of thoughts but was greeted by a vision of Peter’s tired, sad eyes as he had pleaded with her to go outside for a walk. Her eyes flew open to escape what she saw. She reached over and picked up a cup of water and sipped it slowly as her thoughts drifted back to the year before she had the long-awaited surgery.
Cora had been very ill and the illness had attacked the walls of her heart. “You have weak walls,” the doctor had said. She was placed on a list with lots of other people in need of a new heart and so they waited. She was unable to even walk across the room without dizziness, and shortness of breath could come upon her with the smallest of exertions. She had spent the final two months before the surgery in the hospital and how they had prayed and prayed for a new heart to become available. It struck Cora that it was an odd thing to ask God for as it meant the end of someone else’s life. But she had quickly pushed those thoughts aside, and she and Peter had been elated when the news came that a donor heart had become available for Cora.
The weeks immediately following the transplant surgery were a blur of medications, poking and prodding from numerous doctors, checking the wounds and guarding carefully against infection and watching for any sign that Cora’s body would reject the new heart. As time passed and the way smoothed the doctor ordered Cora to be moved to the rehab center located on the eastside of the hospital grounds. Cora had great hope for being able to go home soon and determined to do well and work hard at rehab. But one morning something happened that changed everything.
A couple of weeks into the rehab, the nurse and the technician came in as usual to get her ready. Today she would be walking. She was very excited. They were walking down the hallway when she was gripped by pain in her chest and everything went black. She woke connected to all kinds of machines and felt absolute terror over what had happened. It had turned out to be something minor and really not life threatening but it had rocked her world. A few days later when Nurse Thompson came to prepare her for rehab, Cora had turned away, shutting out any help and refusing to do any exercises. She would not risk such pain again. So here she was months later with a new heart in her chest, but living as though the old heart was still with her.
She set the water cup on the bedside table just as the door opened. Nurse Thompson walked in followed by a young lady who appeared to be no more than sixteen or seventeen years of age. “Why was she here?” Cora thought to herself. Nurse Thompson walked to Cora’s bedside as she said, “Cora, meet Kate. Kate, this is Cora. Cora, Kate is going to read to you today. Would you like to sit in the chair?” Cora bristled inside. She didn’t need to be read to and she certainly didn’t want to get out of her sickbed. “No, I do not want to sit in the chair, and…” Nurse Thompson held up a hand as she spoke firmly, “Cora, you can stay in bed but Kate is going to read to you. Whether you listen or not is your choice.” With that Nurse Thompson turned, and unseen by Cora, winked at Kate as she left the room leaving the smiling Kate alone with her prickly patient.
Kate pulled a chair near the bed and spotted the Bible sitting on the bedside table. “Oh, are you a Christian?” Kate asked. Cora nodded quietly as she studied this young woman. “I am so glad. I know Jesus too,” Kate said with a smile. She noticed Cora’s water cup was nearly empty and stood to refill it, and picked the Bible up before returning to her seat. Cora pointed to a lapel pin on Kate’s blouse as she asked what the pin was for. Kate’s smile broadened as she said, “Oh that is the pin I received in honor of scoring three homeruns on my high school baseball team,” she finished. “Humph,” was the only reply Cora made and proceeded to pretend to look out the window.
Kate had been praying non-stop since she entered the room. She recognized the fear in Cora’s eyes right away, and her heart went out to this woman who seemed unwilling or unable to break the hold fear had on her. Kate opened the Bible, sensing the Lord wanted her to read His Words instead of speaking her own. She quickly turned to Ezekiel 36:26 and began reading. “And I will give you a new heart with new and right desires, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony heart of sin and give you a new, obedient heart.”
Kate continued reading, and Cora continued to stare out the window. Kate read verse 35: “And when I bring you back, people will say, ‘This godforsaken land is now like Eden’s garden! The ruined cities now have strong walls…’” Suddenly Cora turned toward Kate, her eyes smoldering with pent up anger as she pointed a finger at Kate and said, “What do you know about it? What do you know about new hearts or old hearts or weak walls? You can’t possibly know or understand. Get out!” Cora shouted, her body shaking with emotion.
As Cora’s words still hung in the air, Kate moved a hand to her blouse and began unbuttoning the top few buttons as she very gently said, “Oh Cora, but I do know. I do understand.” As she opened the buttons the beginnings of a scar appeared; a very familiar sight to Cora’s eyes as it was no different than the scar she bore on her own chest. Kate buttoned her blouse as a stunned Cora lay back on her pillow completely speechless as she stared at Kate.
Kate rose and took a seat on the edge of the bed and reached out and held Cora’s hand as she spoke in a voice full of compassion. “Cora, after my heart transplant I got a horrible infection and they thought my body was rejecting the new heart. But many people were praying and slowly the battle my body and my new heart were having was won. Like you, I was fearful when rehab began. It was slow and painful. I did not like the pain and I was tempted to give up more than once.” Cora squeezed Kate’s hand as she asked, “Kate, how did you overcome your fear? How did you keep going? How?” she asked.
“The Lord and I were having a talk about my new heart one morning, when I especially felt like quitting. The Lord took me to that passage in Ezekiel that I just read to you. It was then the Lord reminded me that someone had to die in order for me to receive the new heart and if I gave up, if I lived like I still had the old heart beating in my chest, well, it would be as if that person had died for nothing.”
Kate sat quietly, letting the Lord speak to Cora. Kate’s words penetrated Cora’s heart of stone and as she thought about all Kate had said and the verses Kate had read, the Lord’s voice thundered through her soul reminding her of One who had died for her so she could have another kind of new heart – an eternal heart that beat for the Lord. She had been behaving and living like she had the old dead heart of sin in her chest instead of the new, reborn heart the Lord had given her when she had invited Him into her heart back in high school. Cora knew then what was needed.
“Kate,” Cora whispered, “I need to ask God’s forgiveness. I have been so wrong about, well, about everything,” she finished. “Let’s pray,” Kate said. As sunlight spilled into the room, Cora poured her heart out to the Lord and ended by asking Him to give her the strength and the courage to move forward on the road to physical wholeness. They finished praying and then Cora spoke through her tears as she asked Kate to call Nurse Thompson. Kate’s smile was contagious and Cora found herself smiling back – it felt good.
The door opened but instead of Nurse Thompson, Peter entered the room. He saw the tears on Cora’s face and the smile on her lips and something different in her eyes. “What is it?” He asked as he hurried to the bed. Cora grabbed both her husband’s hands in hers as she said, “Oh Peter, please forgive me. I have been so very wrong.” Before Cora could finish explaining to her very confused husband all that had happened, Kate returned with Nurse Thompson right behind her.
Kate had filled Nurse Thompson in on what had taken place so Nurse Thompson came prepared with the rehab schedule in hand. “So,” Nurse Thompson said with a smile and a mischievous twinkle in her eye, “how does tomorrow morning at nine fit into your schedule?” Cora raised a hand in protest and shaking her head replied, “Oh no, I don’t want to wait another day. Can’t we begin this afternoon?” she finished. Peter couldn’t take it another moment as he shouted above the laughter, “Would someone please tell me what has happened?” The room fell silent as Cora turned and with a smile on her lips that began in her heart she said, “Oh Peter, haven’t you heard the news? I have a new heart.”
“Thank you for telling me the story,” I said. “We reached the lake and slowed our pace to a walk, my legs feeling like jello. I looked at the numbers on the pedometer and gave an excited whoop. “I reached my goal,” I said excitedly. “5.16 miles.” He whom my soul loves smiled as He said, “That’s very good.” We were quiet a moment and then He asked me what I was going to do when I got home. “Well,” I began, “I will eat breakfast and then get ready for work.” I looked eastward at the horizon where the promise of the coming sun was turning the sky a deep mauve and then His voice thundered through the stillness of the dawn as He said, “Just as you stand in your closet and decide what to wear to work, so too you must decide how to clothe your heart.” My heart turned to Him, giving Him my full attention as He said, “Choose newness.”
I looked up to see Marc and Teddy walking in our direction and I turned to say something to the Lord, but He had gone. As Marc and Teddy and I headed into the day, I remembered the Words the Lord had shared with me from His book about new hearts and strong walls. “Lord,” I said, “when I am tempted to live like the old heart is still beating in my chest, help me to choose newness. Thank you for dying for me so that I could have a new heart. Remind me that living with a sinful heart of stone, is acting as if your death and resurrection don’t matter. Strengthen and build up the walls of my heart; help me to choose newness.” As I prepared to head out the door to work, I found a note the Lord left on the steps just inside my heart’s door, “Dear daughter, I’ll do it.” I tucked the heavenly note into the pocket of my heart along with all the other notes He had written to me so I could read it again and again on days I was tempted to oldness. And with my new heart beating strongly, keeping perfect time with the Lord’s heartbeat I headed into the day where a world already stirred into hurried busyness was waiting to hear that they too could have a new heart.

NEW HEARTS
Lord, in majesty drawing nigh.
Your mighty hand tenderly paints
the color in the desert evening sky.
Look up dear heart
and see the work of His hand;
even the sky obeys the Lord's command.

Be still dear heart,
as before you colors of night unfolding,
the glory of the Lord,
your eyes beholding.

The moon hangs suspended in the night
by Him who spoke to create its light.
The soft colors of dawn reveal God's glory;
telling human hearts of the greatest love story.

And in the west in the dawn so still,
stands a lighted cross upon a hill.
Speaks to us of Him who died;
beaten, broken, crucified.

His lifeless body taken down from the cross;
by hearts shattered and grieved at the loss.
But three days later as the night gave way;
dawn's light came to reveal the stone rolled away.

Victory in Jesus' eyes it shone;
as for our sins He did atone.
And in our souls those hearts of stone;
can be rolled away as His truth has shown.

The earth itself
in His presence does tremble.
Creation sings its praises
at the gates of His temple.

The mountains stretch heavenward
at the sound of His voice;
urging human hearts
to make their choice.

Bow down dear one,
humble your heart.
Worship the Living God
it's not too late to start.

Tears of joy on your face
as you look in His eyes,
Nail scarred hands touch your soul
till you are humble inside.

Then you'll wonder in awe
under dawns soft colored hue
gone is your heart of stone;
and in its place a heart made new.

An Original Conversations at the Well
Diana Morgan
© Copyright January 10, 2010

New Hearts

Lord, in majesty drawing nigh.

Your mighty hand tenderly paints

the color in the desert evening sky.

Look up dear heart

and see the work of His hand;

even the sky obeys the Lord's command.

Be still dear heart,

as before you colors of night unfolding,

the glory of the Lord,

your eyes beholding.

The moon hangs suspended in the night

by Him who spoke to create its light.

The soft colors of dawn reveal God's glory;

telling human hearts of the greatest love story.

And in the west in the dawn so still,

stands a lighted cross upon a hill.

Speaks to us of Him who died;

beaten, broken, then crucified.

His lifeless body taken down from the cross;

by hearts shattered and grieved at the loss.

But three days later as the night gave way;

dawn's light came to reveal the stone rolled away.

Victory in Jesus' eyes it shone;

as for our sins He did atone.

And in our souls those hearts of stone;

can be rolled away as His truth has shown.

The earth itself

in His presence does tremble.

Creation sings its praises

at the gates of His temple.

The mountains stretch heavenward

at the sound of His voice;

urging human hearts

to make their choice.

Bow down dear one,

humble your heart.

Worship the Living God

it's not too late to start.

Tears of joy on your face

as you look in His eyes,

Nail scarred hands touch your soul

till you are humble inside.

Then you'll wonder in awe

under dawns soft colored hue

gone is your heart of stone;

and in its place a heart made new.

An Original Conversations at the Well Poem
By Diana Morgan
Copyright January 10, 2010

Come to the Well

Jesus said, “If you are thirsty, come to me! If you believe in me, come and drink! For the Scriptures declare that rivers of living water will flow out from within”.

My friend, are you thirsty? Are the arid desert winds blowing across your soul? Perhaps all is well and you are in a season of growth and you are overflowing with the Living Water. Whatever the season you are in; Jesus’ direction is clear, “Come to me”. Can you picture for a moment the scene of Jesus sitting with the woman at the well? She is utterly empty – the very air sapping life from her. In this moment, Jesus looks straight into her very heart and says, “I Am the Messiah.” Oh, the woman is holding her breath. Creation itself seems silent in that moment waiting for the Creator's next word. Beloved, He is right now looking into your heart. He is whispering “I am He. I am the One you seek. The One you need…Come to Me”.

Please join us for ‘Conversations at the Well’ Monday, January 11, 2010 from 7pm to 8:30pm. At the home of Diana Morgan Kindly RSVP to Diana at 567-9339 or respond to this post.

Worship
Conversation at the Well
Time alone at the Well (In God's Word)
Sharing
Prayer

In His Love,
Diana
567-9339

jacobswell@dc.rr.com

“When you are thirsty, help yourself to the water they have drawn from the well.” Ruth 2:9

BETHLEHEM

BETHLEHEM

…in your light we see light. Psalm 36:9

It was dark and there was a chill in the air as I headed to the well. I stopped and lit a spiced cider candle before taking my place. I watched the flame dance and the warmth of the fragrance was soft and inviting. I opened His Book and read Psalm 36 and suddenly and without warning these words jumped off the page and into my heart, “in Your light we see light.” I looked up to see Him whom my soul loves looking at the candle and I smiled as I saw the Light of the world bathed in the soft glow of the candlelight and then my heart got all excited and breathless as it raced back to Psalm 36:9 and read again, “in Your light we see light.” I could not contain myself as my heart looked up at Him again and said, “In Your light I see light.” I could tell by the light dancing in His eyes that He had arranged this moment for me and He came and took a seat very near me at the Well and His presence enveloped me there in the light.
He took me to Isaiah 9:2 and I read it slowly (that’s the best way to read His Word), “The people who walk in darkness will see a great light – a light that will shine on all who live in the land where death casts its shadow.” (NLT) I sat wondering about this light the people in the dark would see and where exactly the light came from and then I stopped in verse 6 as we read together, “For a child is born to us, a son is given to us. And the government will rest on His shoulders. These will be His royal titles: Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. His ever expanding, peaceful government will never end. He will rule forever with fairness and justice from the throne of His ancestor David. The passionate commitment of the Lord Almighty will guarantee this!”
My heart looked into His eyes as I whispered in the stillness, “You are the light that shines on those who live in the land where death casts it shadow. These verses are talking about your birth, aren’t they?” He nodded quietly and my heart caught a reflection of memories from eternity past shining in the eyes of Him whom my soul loves. I wondered then if the angels decorated for Christmas. Did they hang a wreath on Heaven’s door or put up Christmas lights? Did Heaven celebrate the day He laid aside His glory and took on the helplessness of a newborn? Did Jesus followers who had already walked across Heaven’s threshold light candles and sing to Him about that day while angels stand in silent awe of the very wonder of such love by the Creator that He would take on the form of the created? As I sat in the stillness my heart thought it heard echoes of the joyful celebration intertwined with awe and wonder thundering from Heaven.
I wondered if it was the voices of angels my heart heard and if so were they the same angels who had proclaimed Jesus’ birth to a group of shepherds in the fields outside Bethlehem? “What of everyone else? Where were the people of Bethlehem? Didn’t they hear the voices of Angels proclaiming the birth of Him who came to die? Wouldn’t the sound of thousands of Heaven’s warriors singing praise to God travel through the streets of Bethlehem? Did anyone stop even for a moment, tilt their head and wonder what the sound was? Where were they?” I thought to myself. “They didn’t have room,” He said, following my thoughts.
I turned His words over and over in my mind and I realized things hadn’t changed much. My thoughts turned to Christmas lights and I thought about all the different lights of the season: Christmas lights that adorn people’s homes; Christmas tree lights that shine and twinkle and add warmth to evenings with family as they gather around the Christmas tree. The soft glow of candlelight for Christmas parties with co-workers and friends and family as their laughter fills the air. Lights shine from department store windows as frazzled and harried shoppers rush about, cramming one more thing into one more moment in one more hour of one more day. Budgets strain, heads pound, rest is scarce and hearts cry out in the midst of Christmas carols and sleigh bells. All the while, standing unseen by human eyes, the Angels are still proclaiming the Good News! I thought how easily we are distracted by “world-lights” and we miss Him. “No room,” He repeated.
As the flame of the candle danced, my heart nestled quietly at His feet and there in the Light of His Presence He began to share a story with me (He is the Master Storyteller, you know). It was a story of Christmas. As He began to weave the threads of the story into my heart I knew I needed to write it down so I opened my laptop and my fingers danced across the keyboard as He spoke.
The alarm rudely interrupted her sleep and she fumbled in the darkness until her fingers found the off button. Silence filled the house once again with the exception of Andy’s soft snoring. Beth groaned as she sat up. “How on earth had she allowed herself to be talked into this?” she wondered to herself as she headed to the shower. She stood in the shower willing herself to wake up as she recalled the conversation with her friends; the same conversation they had every year, and every year Beth laughed, told them they were crazy and then declined their offer.
She hurried from the bathroom to the closet where she quickly pulled on jeans and a sweater, selected comfortable shoes and sat down on the edge of the bed to put them on. She glanced at the clock; the illuminated numbers mocked her as they announced the time: 3:55 AM! Could it have really been just seven hours ago that she and Andy, Richard, Julie, Amy and John had sat in the living room downstairs sipping coffee in front of the fire after a wonderful Thanksgiving meal? Amy and Julie began talking about all the great bargains they were going to find on their annual shopping trip the next day and Beth could see the invitation coming. She had sat next to Andy giggling, already preparing to decline when she heard Andy say what a good idea he thought it was. After all, money was a bit tight and it wouldn’t hurt to get in on some bargains. “If it’s such a great idea why am I the one going shopping in the middle of the night?” she whispered. The only reply was Andy’s snoring. She pulled on her coat just as a car pulled into the driveway. She peered through the blinds and saw Amy walking to the front door, so grabbing her purse she kissed Andy’s cheek and switched off the light as she headed downstairs.
Beth opened the front door to find Amy standing on her doorstep smiling, holding out a travel mug with a bright red ribbon tied to the handle. “I come bearing gifts,” Amy said with a soft laugh. “It’s too early even for coffee,” Beth moaned as she stepped outside and turned to lock the front door. Amy’s cheerfulness wasn’t dampened in the least by her friend’s lack of enthusiasm. She continued holding out the mug to her friend as she said, “It’s Starbuck’s Christmas Blend. I ground it myself this morning. I even used your favorite creamer: toffee nut. But wait, there’s more. I also added just a sprinkling of ground cinnamon on top. Come on grumpy, take a sip,” Amy urged. “I now know why it is called Black Friday,” Beth said as she took the mug from her friend. “Do tell,” Amy said as they walked to the car. “Because it’s black outside which matches my mood,” Beth quipped as she climbed into the backseat.
Amy and Julie chatted cheerfully as Beth sat quietly in the backseat. She thought about all the things at home she had planned to accomplish that day and wouldn’t get to and would either not get done at all or be pushed to another timeslot. But where would she find time in a schedule in which every moment was already filled? “There’s no room,” she thought to herself. Beth’s mind began racing through the days ahead which were filled to the brim with the tasks of the Season. Her insides suddenly felt as if they were in a vice being squeezed as she ran down her mental calendar. There was a school field trip to the food bank downtown to show the kids how food was distributed to the needy. Then there were two school programs to attend, Andy’s staff Christmas party given by his employer, a family Christmas party at Andy’s parents’ house and the church Christmas pageant, their small group Christmas party at their house, and then she had agreed to help Amy at the local rescue mission on Christmas Eve immediately followed by the Candlelight service at church, and then, finally, Christmas Day. All of this was added on top of the usual day-to-day activities of family life. Then there was the added stress of the economic crunch which was now being felt in their life. As a result of layoffs at Andy’s place of employment his workload had increased but his benefits had been reduced. She sat surveying her life, “no room,” she whispered into the darkness.
She was brought back to the here and now as Amy pulled into the Wal-Mart parking lot where a crowd of shoppers had already congregated at the doors waiting for them to open. Beth got out of the car and decided to try and enjoy herself as the three friends spent the morning shopping together. By eleven o’clock they had each nearly completed their shopping. Julie spotted a Panera and they decided this would be a good time to stop for lunch.
“So,” Amy began, “are you all ready to begin the Advent activities?” All three of them had purchased Advent calendars. Julie and Amy each shared various activities they already had planned and then they looked at Beth eager to hear what Advent plans she had made. “Well?” Julie enquired. Beth looked down at her fork as she confessed that the Advent package was still in its box, unopened. Amy and Julie sat looking at their friend, expressions of concern in their faces. Tears sprang into Beth’s eyes as she felt the internal vice tighten. “No room,” was all she could manage to say.
A few hours later Amy helped Beth carry her packages from the car into the house. Amy gave Beth a big “I love you friend” hug before she headed home. Beth closed the front door and didn’t see her friend sitting in the front seat of her car with her head bowed having a conversation with her Heavenly Father about a dearly loved friend and sister in Christ who had found herself with no room. A few hours later found Beth lying exhausted in bed and yet unable to sleep. Her thoughts were racing around and around in her head leaving no room for rest or even the ability to carry it all to the Lord. “No room,” she whispered. Sometime in the wee hours a troubled sleep came.
The weeks passed and Beth ticked off the activities on the calendar as each came and went. The week before Christmas Beth was heading out the door to one more meeting when Andy asked her why the Nativity had not been set out yet. Beth turned and looked at the place on the mantle where the Nativity usually sat, she felt that internal vice tighten another couple of notches as she mumbled under her breath, “No room.” She arrived home late and the kids were already in bed and Andy had fallen asleep on the couch. She got ready for bed and went back downstairs to clean things up and get ready for the next day’s activities when she noticed Andy had set the Nativity out on the mantle.
The fire snapped and crackled cheerfully in the fireplace inviting her to rest a while. She stood there looking at the figures and realized she simply wanted Christmas to be over. She was tired of the endless lists of things that had to get done and places she had to be and deadlines she had to meet and she knew she had been standing there when she should have been doing things – there was no room in her day for standing and looking at Nativity scenes. No room for rest. “No room,” she whispered as she walked off to her next task.
Christmas Eve arrived and Beth pulled into an empty parking space in front of the Rescue Mission. She spotted Amy’s car a few spots over and headed to the entrance as she glanced at her watch. She hoped all would go smoothly as there was no room in her schedule for anything unplanned. They were supposed to finish serving dinner and wrapping gifts at the Mission by 6:30 which would leave Beth just enough time to go home, clean up and go to church with her family for the Christmas Eve Candlelight Service at 8:00.
Amy and Beth worked hard cooking in the kitchen and then served food for two hours straight. The next shift of servers arrived to relieve them and Beth headed toward the gift wrap area where she would spend her final hour at the mission wrapping gifts for the many people who would be spending Christmas there. Suddenly the air seemed stifling and Beth decided to step outside for a moment or two for some fresh air. She stepped through the rear door into a small courtyard behind the mission. The air was cold but welcome. Beth closed her eyes for a moment, leaning her head against the stone wall.
“Are you alright?” A man’s voice interrupted Beth’s quiet moment. She opened her eyes and found herself looking up at a tall, middle-aged man with a scruffy looking beard and ragged clothes. “I am fine. Just getting a little air,” Beth replied as she turned to head back inside. “The name’s Gabriel,” the man said as he extended his hand. Beth pretended not to notice his friendly gesture and reached for the doorknob as she said, “I really need to get back. There’s so much left to do.” Gabriel stepped closer and reached the door first and held it open for her as he said, “Can you come to the Christmas play we are doing tonight?” Beth tried to hide her surprise as she wondered what type of Christmas play this raggedy man would be in as she quickly replied, “No. I couldn’t possibly. No room,” she finished as she disappeared through the door and quickly headed to the gift wrap area. She glanced around the room and didn’t see Gabriel anywhere and assumed he had probably gone to the dining hall. She quickly put him out of her thoughts as she wrapped Christmas presents.
An hour later found Beth walking to her car wondering where the joy was she was supposed to feel – especially this time of year. But she didn’t feel joy. She reached her car and stood there a moment in the dark wrestling with something inside that was threatening to consume her. What was it she felt exactly? She closed her eyes and turned her face heavenward just as the first snowflakes began to gently fall and as they began kissing her face leaving droplets of moisture on her cheeks she realized what she felt inside: dry. “Oh Father, please help me,” she whispered into the darkness as she opened her car door and climbed inside, unaware that her prayer was heard long before it ever left her lips and help was waiting just down the road.
Beth pulled out of the parking lot onto the two lane road toward home. The snow was falling more heavily and she slowed her car as she entered a sharp curve. As she made the turn a deer suddenly sprang from the darkness directly in front of her and Beth slammed on the brakes, her car skidding to a stop as she heard a loud noise coming from her car. She sat clutching the steering wheel, her heart beating wildly as the deer stood staring at her in the headlights and then bounded off leaving her there to deal with this on her own. “Great!” she exclaimed as she rummaged through the glove box for the flashlight. She snapped the flashlight on, opened the car door and got out and walked to the other side of her car. Just as she feared, the rear passenger side tire was flat as a pancake. She walked back to the driver side, grabbed her cell phone from the center console to call the Auto Club but was unable to get a signal. “Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!” she yelled into the darkness to no one in particular.
“Are you alright?” a familiar voice asked. Startled, Beth pointed her flashlight in the direction of the voice and found Gabriel standing across the road. “Wh-what are you doing out here, Gabriel?” Beth asked nervously. Gabriel smiled as he explained, “We are having our Christmas play right over here in this field. You are invited, Beth.” He finished gently. Beth couldn’t remember telling him her name and it gave her an odd, unsettled feeling. She glanced at her watch as she said, “Sorry, Gabriel. I have to see to my car and then I have someplace to be and…” her voice trailed off and she heard Gabriel’s voice right next to her softly say, “I know Beth, you have no room.”
She turned around expecting Gabriel to be standing right behind her but was surprised to see he was still across the road. She stood shivering by her car, a puzzled look on her face as Gabriel said, “Don’t worry about your tire, Beth. Come,” he invited. She stood there shivering as she wrestled over what she should do. A thought occurred to her then that perhaps she could get a phone signal out in the field so she made her decision and quickly grabbed her car keys and her cell phone, shut the driver’s door and hit the lock button and headed across the street, hoping she wasn’t acting foolishly and that Gabriel wasn’t crazy.
It had stopped snowing and they walked together in silence, the fallen snow crunching under their feet. Beth stole a sideways glance at the odd man walking beside her. “He must be seven feet tall,” she mused to herself. He was in need of a haircut and a shave. His clothes were tattered and obviously meant for someone a bit shorter. She looked down at his shoes; they were mismatched. As she looked at his feet something else struck her; something about his walk. Yes, he walked with purpose; like he knew where he was going and what to do when got there. “Odd,” she thought to herself. She decided to ask a question that had come to mind when he had first mentioned the play, “What part do you have in the Christmas play?” she asked. “I’m a messenger,” He said quietly. “You mean you play an angel?” she asked. “Something like that,” He said. Beth looked up at him and thought she saw something flash in his eyes but quickly dismissed the thought as they came through a cluster of trees into an open field.
Movement caught her eye and she could make out sheep through the darkness their gentle bleating breaking the stillness. She could also see several small campfires dotting the field and men huddled around them, some stretching their hands toward the flames to keep warm. Beth looked at Gabriel as she asked, “Shepherds?” “Yes,” came the one word reply. Gabriel seated Beth at a small campfire. He handed her a wool blanket which she gladly put over her legs. He pulled something from his coat pocket and handed it to her as he said, “It’s the script. You can read along, if you like.” She looked down and saw that he had handed her a Bible. It fell open to the book of Luke. She was about to say something but when she looked up Gabriel was headed in the direction of the shepherds.
Beth began to read the text, “There were shepherds in a field outside of Bethlehem, tending their flocks by night.” She looked up as her eyes took in the scene before her, “Shepherds tending their flocks by night,” she whispered. It was then she noticed Gabriel standing near a group of shepherds. “But when did he have time to change?” she wondered out loud. He was clothed in white and looked quite impressive as she took in the realistic looks of fear mixed with awe on the faces of the shepherds. She looked down, following the words of Gabriel’s announcement to the Shepherds and looked up as the words came to life in the field before her very eyes.
Nothing prepared her for what happened next. All of a sudden the field shown brilliant as what appeared to be an army of men all every bit as tall as Gabriel and they were singing a song she had never heard before – it was a song of praise to God and the very ground beneath her seemed to reverberate with the sound of their joy. “Oh!” she cried. “But how…who…?” was all she could manage. Then just as suddenly as they had appeared they vanished and the field was cloaked in a strange silence.
The air was electric as she heard the shepherds’ excited tones and then they all began running. She read the text out loud, “They ran to the village and found Mary and Joseph and there was the baby lying in the manger.” She looked up to see the shepherds slow their pace as they approached what appeared to be a hollowed out place in the hillside. She caught a glimpse of firelight and a young man and woman sitting in its warmth. The shepherds stood peering inside when she heard it – a baby’s cry through the night. Beth saw a tiny hand extend up out of the feeding trough and the young woman brushed a tear from her cheek as she motioned the shepherds to come near.
As Beth sat riveted to the scene the young woman lifted the baby out of the manger. He was wrapped in strips of cloth, “just as the angel said,” Beth whispered. Something on the hillside above them caught her eye and she looked up just as the clouds lifted, revealing the hilltop and on it stood a cross. She caught her breath as she stood looking from the manger to the cross the tears flowing down her cheeks as a familiar voice softly asked, “Beth, do you have room?” She went to her knees in the middle of that field and talked to the Lord about her heart that she had allowed to become so busy that she had run out of room: no room to sit with Him, no room to read His Word, no room to sit in His presence.
Gabriel helped her up and she smiled as she noticed he was wearing his tattered clothes and mismatched shoes again. As they walked back toward her car it began to snow again and as she turned her face heavenward and the snowflakes gently kissed her face, leaving tiny drops of moisture on her cheeks, she realized she wasn’t dry on the inside anymore. Her once dry heart was drenched in joy. They arrived at the car and she stopped and stared. She turned a puzzled look at Gabriel. “Look at that,” he said, “someone fixed your tire.” Gabriel helped her into her car and before he closed the door she reached out and took his hand in hers. She couldn’t speak and he simply nodded and then closed her door.
She glanced at her watch and then out the window, intending to wave goodbye to Gabriel but he was gone. She pulled her cell phone from her coat pocket. “That’s funny,” she thought, “My cell phone has full power now.” She shrugged and called Andy and quickly told him about the flat tire and that she would just meet him at church. Then she dialed Amy’s number. She answered on the third ring and Beth told her how much she enjoyed the Christmas play the mission had put on and she hoped they would do it again and that Gabriel made an excellent angel. “Amy?” Beth said into the silence. Amy sounded confused as she answered, “Beth, I don’t have any idea what you are talking about. The mission didn’t do any Christmas plays. And Beth, there’s no one at the mission named Gabriel.” Beth set her phone down on the seat, her heart overwhelmed within her.
Fifteen minutes later she pulled into the church parking lot. She hurried inside and spotted Andy and the kids sitting in the third row. Andy squeezed her hand as she sat down and then kissed her cheek as he whispered, “I love you, Beth.” Then he reached over and pulled something from her hair as he whispered, “Beth, where on earth have you been?” She looked at the piece of straw Andy held in his fingers and she smiled as she said, “I’ve been to Bethlehem.”
I closed my laptop and through my tears whispered, “Lord, thank you. Thank you for coming. Thank you for going from the manger to the cross for me. Forgive me for the times I didn’t have room for you. Help me never to lose sight of who you are and why you came. When I am distracted by the world-lights will you take me back to Bethlehem? My heart looked into the eyes of Love as His voice thundered through my soul, “I will beloved. I will.”


An Original Conversations at the Well
Diana Morgan
© Copyright December 7, 2009

LOVE NOTES

Have you ever received a love note? As the Lord and I sat in deep conversation this morning, He reminded me of times I have opened my lunch to find a love note; sometimes from my husband and sometimes from one of my children. Elizabeth still leaves me love notes by the coffeemaker (she knows my first stop of the morning :-) ) from time to time - complete with a smiley face. My husband will leave one in my lunchbag or sometimes stuck to the steeringwheel of my car. I treasure these notes. They are generally short words of encouragement reminding me I am being thought of; that I am important and matter and I am so very loved.

This morning as I opened my Bible to Jeremiah 31:3 there on the page was a love note tucked there just for me from Him whom my soul loves. It said, "Dear Diana, I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with lovingkindness." My heart looked up into the eyes of Him who pursued me with a love I did not know was possible. I opened my journal and wrote a love note back to Him. When my son was little he would leave me love notes too and he always signed them, "Love Your Son, Joshua Morgan", as if I might have forgotten who he was and to whom he belonged. I always wrapped him in my arms and assured him I knew who he was - my child. As I wrote my note to the Lord I didn't need to tell him who I was at the end. He knew it already as He wrapped me up in His embrace and whispered to my heart, "Dear one, I know who you are. You are my child. Precious and loved. I know your name."

Isaiah 49:16 says this: "See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands." Dear one, are you feeling discouraged this morning? Do you feel unloved, uncared for, unimportant? Beloved, the Lord has written you a love note and it is tucked in the pages of His Word. In it He lets you know you are being thought of; you matter; you are important to Him and you are dearly loved by Him. I believe the Lord loves to receive love notes back from us. As you sit with Him and pen your heart-thoughts you can know He won't lose it. He won't read it and wonder who it's from. He recognizes it and His eyes dance as He thinks on One dear to His heart. He knows the heart well who wrote it - His child. He knows your name for it is engraved on the palm of His hand.

Beloved, you've got mail. It is a love note from the very heart of God. It is tucked inside His Word just waiting to be opened. Will you open it now?

An original Conversations at the Well

Diana Morgan

November 23, 2009

Quiet Time Devotional Book

Dear Friends,

It is with great pleasure I announce that Conversations at the Well, Heart-to-Heart Conversations With God is now available in the Southwest Community Church bookstore. I have had women tell me they keep Conversations in their quiet time basket; what joy this brings me. I pray the Lord continues to draw people into relationship with Him and hearts will be made new as they sit at the Well in intimate Conversation with Him. Come. Come to the Well.

Love,

Diana Morgan

THE LIGHT WITHIN THE LIGHT

THE LIGHT WITHIN THE LIGHT

…in your light we see light. Psalm 36:9

I am always amazed at how the Lord draws me into a new story to share. Yesterday as I went into my time with Him at the Well I stopped and lit a spiced cider candle that sits on a small table. I watched the flame dance and the warmth of the fragrance was soft and inviting. I began my time with Him in Psalm 36 and suddenly and without warning these words jumped off the page and into my heart, “in your light we see light.” I looked up to see Him whom my soul loves looking at the candle and I smiled as I saw the Light of the world bathed in the soft glow of the candlelight and then my heart got all excited and breathless as it raced back to Psalm 36:9 and read again, “in your light we see light.” I could not contain myself as my heart looked up at Him again and said, “In the light I see light.” I could tell by the light dancing in His eyes that He had arranged this moment for me and He came and took a seat very near me at the Well and His presence enveloped me there in the light. Oh the conversation we had about light.

We are entering the season of "Lights". Department store lights. Christmas tree lights. Christmas party twinkle lights. Outdoor Christmas lights. Candlelight. Fire light. Joy that lights up the eyes of dear ones welcoming sweet family members and friends into their hearts and homes. Light that sparkles in a husbands eyes as he watches his wife open a gift he planned just for her. But in the midst of all these lights there is another; the dearest Light of all. But oh how many of us miss Him: Light within the lights. Long ago the light of a star hung by unseen hands cast its light on a stable in a little known town called Bethlehem. And there in its light lay THE Light.

My dear friend, don’t let the busyness of this season steal from you the treasure of sitting with the LIGHT. Will you join me and step out of the fray and the noise and sit awhile at the Well as we have a Conversation about the Light Within The light.

Conversations at the Well
Monday, December 7th at 7:00pm

In His Love,
Diana
567-9339